sooo.... I know my boyfriend's unhappy, and I know he would rather hang out with his friends than be with me. For some reason he is still with me pretending he wants to. I am just so hurt that he won't be honest with me. And he wonders why I don't trust him. I'm honestly trying so hard to trust him, but he hasn't given me a reason to yet. He tells me things when I ask him, but how do I know if he's telling the truth. He's flat out said he'd rather lie than tell the truth if it's about a sensitive topic. And I'm supposed to trust him? (Also the thing with the girl V).

Anyway so I've tried to get him to open up to me and tell me how he feels (which I know I know.. guys don't talk about their feelings blah blah.. but whatever.. I don't buy it. He knows how he's feeling and I know everytime I bring it up he thinks about telling me, but decides it best not to). And it obviously hasn't worked thus far... so... I decided, after much deliberation, to write him an email explaing how I felt about everything and here it is:

Dear Mike,

I've been debating on writing this letter for a while now, but I didn't know why and I didn't know how I would put it into words. I know I've told you I love you, and I know I've told you I want to be with you forever, so I suppose you pretty much already know what I'm about to say.

I know you better than a lot of people do, and I've realized the adversity that you've faced in your life and it's affected you more than people could imagine. I've heard your horror stories from your childhood, and so many instances in which you literally were helpless. I've watched you grow over the years and deal with being an awkward teenager not accepted by stuck-up society, and be rejected by girls who broke your heart. I've seen you handle difficulties of jealousy and friendships and get a big dose of the real world, perhaps sooner than you'd anticipated. I've watched you with your families and I see the longing for peace and love in your eyes. I watched you bring your niece into this world, and I saw you help your grandfather through a rough time. I've seen so much more than you probably know, Mike and I want you to know - I'M HERE.
I'm here for you, Michael Robert Ford, and I always will be. I've told you that you're it for me and I have found my life partner in you. I mean it. Every word. I love you more than anyone has loved another; I love you to the point that love is not a strong enough word. I realize  we've both hurt each other immensely and it has caused  a lot of strife and pain in our relationship. You broke my heart and broke my trust and I too crushed you. Of course neither one of us wanted to hurt each other, but on a level we both knew what we were doing would do just that. As you said, "Sometimes the best of intentions causes the worst harm."  To this day we both feel a pang and a sickness in our guts when we think about those things (and it seems we are too constantly reminded), but I'm starting to look at all we've been through in another light. We got through those things. What we went through some even seasoned, long-time married couples couldn't push through, but we did. If anything it showed us that we have a strong bond between us, and we will not let that bond be broken.
Like I said, Mike, I love you and I always will. And I believe "With love, all things are possible." We've both been through a lot and we will continue to face animosity and adversity, but together it will be so much easier. I will stand by your side through everything and I will hold your hand in good times and bad. I will support you and help you with anything you dream, and will be anything you need me to be.

This is how I feel. If you don't feel the same way please please please tell me now. There's no point in me feeling this way if it is not returned, and I don't want you to spend your life doing something you don't want to do.
You're my world, and I will always love you no matter what. :)

Love always,
Jess

I haven't gotten a reply. FAIL.

Because of the way I feel about him I guess I just want to try absolutely everything I can to salvage this relationship so when it does go under maybe I'll feel better knowing I did everything I could. Am I trying to hard? Should I just let it go? Should I keep trying?